Annabelle (2014) review.

Annabelle

Annabelle Review.

1hr 35min

Cast: Annabelle Wallis. Ward Horton. Alfre Woodard.

Director: John R. Leonetti

Producer: James Wan

 

 

So I should be writing up a review for the newly released Annabelle, describing the jumpy scenes and character development. Unfortunately the only thing I can describe right now is the inside of my hands, as my hands were in direct contact with my face for 99% of the film.

But in all seriousness, this film was the scariest film I have seen since The Conjuring and I have a very high threshold for horror films as I pretty much grew up with Freddy and Jason while other children my age cooed over Barney the Bear and Elmo.

Anyway, I digress; this film is set in 1960s America and focuses around John and Mia Form. Mia is heavily pregnant with their first child and as a gift John presents her with a doll to complete the collection in the nursery.

Laughter erupted around the cinema as Mia exclaimed how thrilled she was with the doll. A mutual chorus of ‘Fuck That’ filled the dark room as the camera focuses in on the creepy, horrible looking doll.

I do not want to give the whole plot away as that is not the point of a review, you can watch the movie yourself to find out what happens next, and I am adamant you need to watch this movie……now.

What I was most impressed with was the unpredictability of the jumpy moments. There was so much room for clichéd horror movie scares but the director steered away from the obvious tactics and left the audience unprepared for the mini heart attack which was about to take place.

There was an obvious lack of cheesy horror techniques in Annabelle, and it was the first film in a long time that I didn’t actually roll my eyes in annoyance at the predictability of the script or characters.

What I also loved was the very brief appearance of the original Annabelle doll in the antique store, during the last scene of the movie. Look real close – you might just spot her.

I must add that this is NOT the real story of how Annabelle came to be possessed. The first and the last scene of the film are the only scenes that are factual and are based on the real story of Annabelle. If you want to find out the real story check out my previous blog post here: https://thisismyhorror.wordpress.com/2014/02/09/haunted-dolls/

I left the cinema after watching Annabelle wanting to pray and bathe in holy water. I could almost feel Annabelle’s beady little eyes watching me as I walked in the pitch dark to my car. Bloody Annabelle. It didn’t help that I was coming back to a house full of suspected haunted dolls.

 

 

My Childhood.

Forget TellyTubbies and Barney the friggin Bear, i watched Childs Play, IT and Nightmare on Elm Street. I turned out Okish.

Chernobyl Diaries – Review

It is Friday night and i thought i would settle down to get scared with 2012 horror movie Chernobyl Diaries. I should have watched Finding Nemo instead.

It was filmed in the style of ‘drunk best friend capturing the holiday’s memories on a camera phone,’ and it just hurt my eyes. The scenery of the abandoned city would have looked fantastic in wide angled smooth sweeping shots, but unfortunately the budget didn’t allow for such extravagance.

I don’t want to give anything away in case you somehow want to waste 90 minutes of your life and watch the film yourself, but don’t expect some revolutionary style ending. The acting was OK, the idea could have been developed so much more as i had high hopes for this film. There were no real scares. I sat there the entire time with a grimace that resembles a reaction to a stinky fart.

Overall i would give the film a 2 out of 10

Evil Dead (2013) – Review

 

OH WOW. I don’t even know where to start. As a horror fanatic i am ashamed to say i have never seen the 1981 original, so i went into this with no expectations. The bar for this film was still set pretty high, i had read fantastic reviews online and in the papers, so i am glad i wasn’t disappointed. Jane Levy played Mia, and i thought she did a fantastic job as she was believable as both the sweet innocent girl going through a bad time, and the evil tormented victim of this demon. I have a bit of a girl crush on Jane Levy since watching her in Suburgatory, but you really do forget you are watching her. I have said previously i am not a huge fan of blood and guts, but this was done brilliantly with many ‘EW’ moments and hand in front of the eyes viewing.

I would give this 9 out of 10!!

 

 

My top 5 Horror films.

I am not claiming that the list i am about to compile is the list of best horror films, but this is my personal favorites. I know horror and fear is subjective and one person can be pushed over the edge by some blood or guts, someone else is partial to the occasional zombie. The list is of the horror films which i have either gone back to time and time again for a scare, or films that i spent watching between my finger tips.

1) IT (1990)

One for the clown lovers (haters) out there. I watched this two part series/film when i was about 7 years old and it scarred me for life. The sewer scenes are ones that are etched into my eyelids and every time i close my eyes the images haunt me. It is such a well done film that i think this could scare the younger generations for years to come. It is very long, at 195 minutes and the first half is definitely more interesting, but a great horror film none the less.

LINK – http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZJgydsVdz2E

2) REC (2007)

This film genuinely gave me nightmares after watching it. Even with Spanish subtitles, this film is very easy to follow, the acting is amazing and the hand held cameras add tension. Focusing around an apartment building where all the residents are being kept in quarantine, a local presenter follow around the Spanish firefighters for the night, where they are led to the building. It is scary, jumpy, and you will be digging your fingernails into the sofa, so it is well worth a watch. The Americans did an awful remake called Quaranine, i am not a fan on remakes in general, but the acting sucked so bad i gave up after 10 minutes.

TRAILER – http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GAnbWCjmOkA

3) Switchblade Romance (2003) 

Not too much romance is in this film, so don’t be fooled by the title. This French thriller is everything you don’t expect it to be. Blood and guts spend a good amount of time being oozed out of most of the characters, but the right amount of chase and tension give this film the edge. I guarantee you will be shocked by the ending, and will be sat there wishing you could watch it again! It wont necessarily give you nightmares, but it has a very interesting story and does make you think. Go on, use your brain for a bit.

TRAILER – http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sCZen48N-e8

4) Martyrs (2008)

Another French film on the list, and the 3rd foreign film. I am sensing a pattern here. A young girl who was abused as a child goes in search for her captors to seek revenge……but that is far from the whole plot. It is disturbing and stomach churning, but the story is so captivating that you are forced to stare at the screen from beginning to end. This film will leave you with a million questions, but in a good way, you wont forget this film in a hurry.

TRAILER –  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lNpDiQimK6U

5) The Blair Witch Project (1999)

One of the original films to popularise the ‘Found footage’ genre’. The Blair Witch Project raised the bar for horror movies by creating a very ‘real’ feel to the movie. Fantastic marketing and publicity helped set the illusion that this film was indeed found footage from 3 students doing a project on the Blair Witch. Although you dont actually ‘see’ what is tormenting these students, the atmosphere created is tense and scary. Fantastic film.

TRAILER – http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a_Hw4bAUj8A

Review: The Purge

 

12 hours where all crime is legal. 12 hours where hate filled and angry people can murder. These 12 hours end and everything goes back to normal, where employment is at 1% and the economy is booming. Hmm…

This film was a roller coaster rider, but the metaphor doesn’t describe the tension and build up, it describes the massive loop holes obvious from the first 10 seconds. It is such a shame really, as i had high hopes for this film, i loved Sinister and Paranormal Activity.  The film jumps straight into the Sandins preparing for the annual purge, the children are anxious and the dad ensures them it will just be like every other year and they will be fine. Famous last words….

The Sandins are faced with a dilemma when young Charlie lets in a homeless man being chased by ‘Purgers’. It is now up to Ethan Hawke, sorry i mean James Sandin, to decide whether he release the homeless guy back into the street like an injured gazelle amongst the lions, or keep him inside and let 30 strangers kill him and his family? What would you do? James, being a big softie, can’t bear to carry the weight of this mans life on his heart, so instead he pulls out his massive gun and says ‘We are gonna fight’….. 

So he cant bear to indirectly kill one guy, but 30? Fiiiinnnne. Pass the bullets. So the savage purgers break into the house, dance and giggle around for a bit, then attempt to find the family to kill. I’m sorry, but that is a lot of effort for one homeless guy. There are about 5 very annoying scenes where a purger is face-to-face with a Sandin family member and they decide to recite some Shakespeare monologue before they pull the trigger, and in that time someone else turns up and shoots them from behind.

Even the Sandins neighbors turn up to join in on some Sandin blood shed, but wait, it gets to 7am (the end of the purge) and they all just stroll back to their home and continue to brew a pot of coffee, like nothing happened. I am sorry but any sane person would not feel the need to kill a person, even if it were legal for one day. A killer doesn’t have the restraints to deny the pleasure they get from blood shed to one day a year, if they had restraint there would be no murder at all. Wouldn’t it be a huge cycle of revenge to kill who killed your loved one the year before? 

I would personally just date my tax returns to the date of the Purge and live with the safety blanket of the ‘Crime Free day’, technically i committed tax evasion on the day where it was legal…so Na na Na na naaaaaaa. 

 

Oh i forgot to write *SPOILER ALERT* Woops. You will thank me. 

Ghost Adventures

 

As far as ghost hunting shows go, i would say Ghost Adventures is my favorite. Zak Bagans, Nick Groff and Aaron Goodwin take you on an hour long thrill ride to some of the most haunted places in the world. I particularly like the fact there isn’t a huge TV crew following them around and it is just the three of them during the investigation, or the ‘Lockdown’ as they call it.

The first 15 – 20 minutes of the show delves into the history of the location,i find the longer the history part of the show – the less evidence they manage to capture, but that’s just my opinion. You can tell they are really passionate about each location they visit, and it isn’t just about capturing a cool EVP, its about learning what the spirits had went through while they were alive.

One main reason why i love Ghost Adventures is that they actively try to debunk any audio or visual abnormalities and they do not patronise the audience by going ‘Oh my god a noise, that was definitely a ghost’. They do not feel the need to exaggerate evidence or create anything fake to excite the audience, if they don’t capture much evidence they will flat out say ‘we didn’t capture much’. This just validates the evidence when they DO capture something.

Sometimes the re-enacted scenes can be cheesy sure, sometimes the history portion of the show can drag but it just shows they are trying to be informative as well as entertaining and this just makes me have more respect for them. Personally, i love Aarons scared face, someone should make a GIF of all Aarons :O moments haha.

I have nearly watched every episode of Ghost Adventures and i would personally recommend it to everyone. The Edinburgh vaults episode was a shocker, and the Bob Mackeys bar is just terrifying. These guys make ghosts seem cool, and after watching the show, the only three guys you would want with you on a ghost hunt is Zac, Nick and Aaron.